I ache all over.
At the end of the fight.
Sometimes a girl just needs to be held.
I ache all over.
At the end of the fight.
Sometimes a girl just needs to be held.
Stimulated by war.
By visceral passion for what she wants.
She will survive
by any means necessary.
She is a Wolf.
And she is not to be trifled with.
today I unfolded my past.
it was crumpled up in a drawer
behind poetry books, skepticism and old birthday cards.
a woman who once had an open heart.
she was so beautiful.
proof that it can happen again.
i long to be cracked open.
Here, I see the sky.
Here, I am part of the earth.
Here, things are growing up and I am a part of that.
Here, shadows are chased by light that sparkles.
Here, I smell the leaves and the grass and the spirits and hope.
Here, I feel spirits.
Here, I know there is more in this universe than rocks and air.
Here, I feel beauty.
So I’ll continue looking in this direction.
I vow to see you.
I vow to be kind.
I vow to be gentle.
I vow to be understanding.
I vow to use my voice.
I vow to be supportive.
I vow to be truthful.
I vow to believe in possibilities.
I vow to accept in every stage.
I vow to deem you worthy.
I vow to challenge.
I vow to inspire.
I vow to love.
a glance of fate around me.
a unique delight
of the bustling empire.
dreams bursting from skyscrapers.
stale hope singing on street corners.
a spectacle of talent and chance.
people making life happen.
or waiting for life to happen.
turn my world back into a place
where sunsets are magic
and first touches ignite my insides to poetry.
anything less feels wrong.
right my world.
and i’ll show you a world
you never knew existed.
When the fire is hot
And my guard is down…
The fire finds my skin and claims it.
Transforms fair white to blood red.
It takes but a mere moment to change it forever.
It doesn’t long to be touched.
It doesn’t crave to be seen.
It needs to hide and heal in private.
One day the hurt will stop.
One day the scar will fade.
But when you look closely…
It’s there. It’s always there.
the radiant world trembled
in my hand.
i plucked it from the cosmos
moments before it got
burned by the
doubt of the disbelievers.
and now, I hold the oceans
and the deserts
and the mountains
and the dreams of the believers
in my hands,
and worship them
like they are my reasons for being.
oh, that’s right... they always were.
we, tired little disasters
question the path.
crushing cigars and flower petals,
listening to beautiful cruel passion
absorb into our being.
swallowed in one gulp
by our thirsty hearts.
“And then one day, you fall asleep underneath it… and have this amazing dream that it bloomed right before your eyes, surrounding you in light pink flowers. And then the wind comes and blows through the flowers, and shakes them loose…so there is pink snow falling around you… seemingly from Heaven. And you feel beautiful and alive and free. And then you lay on the ground in this blanket of pink snow… and you breathe it in so deep… because you are so afraid that you’re going to wake up and it’s all going to be gone,”
- A quote from Running Into Monet, by Camile Arnone
Those who know me best, know how symbolic pink trees are to me. It’s always been my vision of love. Standing beneath these beautiful trees this time of year, I feel at home. I am reminded of my beautiful college experience; walking thru my quad with old friends that just got “it.” I am reminded of writing my first full-length play, Running Into Monet, which is centered around this symbolism. I am reminded of what I’m capable of doing when I put my mind to it. And I’m reminded that beautiful moments are sometimes as fleeting as the two weeks of pink trees in the spring… but I guess that’s what makes them so precious.
a thousand reasons to say no.
a million things to let go.
i need to prove this life is worth more.
than standing behind a closed door.
and so, I walk thru.
maybe not so ready.
maybe not so steady.
but the moment i walk through…
i know i was meant to be on this side.
The cup of coffee.
The glass of good wine that floods you.
The fresh, crisp air that feels like the
First few moments of falling in love.
Look for it.
Give yourself permission to
The decadence of life.
Let it find a home inside of you…
So you don’t lose who you are meant to be.
snow falling in moonlight.
french music floating on the wind
seeping thru the window of a distant restaurant.
i stroll down the street and think,
“this is a city for lovers.”
and so, I reach in my chest,
amputate my broken heart,
and kick it down the street as I stroll.
the beauty is painful.
but it’s still magic.
- camile grace
Yesterday, we celebrated Mother's Day. We took time out of our busy lives to have brunch or give gifts or send flowers or make dinner for the women that take care of us on a daily basis.
It just got me thinking how profound a job being a mother is. It's an incredible responsibility to be a caregiver.... life giver... love giver.... 365 days a year... from the moment that child is conceived.
I am extremely lucky to have a mother who is my source of strength... my morals... my root. It is because of her I love the way that I do... I take care of people the way that I do.... I see the world the way that I do. I am grateful.... so truly grateful.
I tell my mom whenever I see her that, "she's the prettiest girl in the world." I believe that. And I think it's so important that she hears it. My wish for my mom is that she receives love and appreciation... and grasps what a phenomenal woman she is. And so, I tell her.
Women sometimes don't hear that from their kids... or spouses. Sometimes in the mess of life, we forget to say these important validating statements. I hear it everyday from women in my life. And I always think, "What a shame." It's not that their loved ones don't feel it. They probably do. But... sometimes we don't take the time.
Tell your mom she's beautiful. Tell her how much you appreciate her and why. Tell her she's not only an incredible mom... but a kick-ass woman who's overcome her own struggles and has had triumphs that have nothing to do with you! Tell her... because she should hear it.... everyday.... not just on Mother's Day.
Spreading the love!
To all the Mother's in my life... thank you for doing a beautiful job.
This photo is recently taken of my friend, Danielle, who will soon be a mom to her third daughter! She's stunning!
My mom always pointed out that it usually rains on Good Friday. But, not this year. This year... it was a bright, cool, peaceful spring day where I found myself drawn to Argyle Lake in Babylon.
I spent the afternoon looking at the world around me. I took the time to really see it. To absorb what was going on. As I exchanged glances and smiles with people... I recognized a peace in them that I was feeling in myself that moment.
We had all been drawn there on Good Friday afternoon. Me, searching for time sitting underneath my Cherry Blossom Trees. Fathers and sons fishing together. An old man sitting on a bench in the bright sun, with his eyes closed. A woman chasing her 3 year old granddaughter around. People walking their dogs. Children watching the ducks and playing on swings. A father and daughter spending time together in their special place. Birds chirping, wind blowing. Peace.
I became extremely thankful for that moment and I realized... God was all around me. In the connection of the loved ones... in the solitude of those sitting on a bench or walking their pups. And I sat there smiling and watching people take that moment to slow down in their busy lives.
And then... a live enactment of stations of the cross came around Argyle Lake, right passed where I was sitting. And I thought..."How interesting. I chose not to go to church... but church came to me."
We all need to slow down sometimes. Life's troubles can be overwhelming. I propose this on Easter Sunday... Get off your phones and look around. Be present with the ones you love. Look at the beauty of this world. It's in the laughter of children. It's in the hug from your best friend. It's in the wind in the trees. It's in the kiss from your spouse. It's in the kindness of strangers.
I thank God... the Universe... for these things.... and hope you take the time to really see them and have a grateful moment for yourselves today.
God Bless... and Happy Easter!
This month has been so rewarding! A few weeks ago, I walked into Zwanger Pesiri Radiology to find my photograph gracing the cover of the premiere issue of Long Island Image Magazine (Zwanger Pesiri's new Lifestyle Magazine.) The article inside is a beautiful representation of my project, featuring Deanna Lilimpakis, and her beautiful little girl. I am deeply honored that this work is in a place where people are sitting, waiting to get tested, scared, unsure about what the future holds. I can only hope that the photos and stories of these Warriors will give others hope & immense strength.... and put them in a healthy headspace. Because, if these glorious women can come out the other side thriving... anyone can. To my Warriors... you inspire me every single day. <3
Front Page Image:
Hair & Makeup by Jillian Kristine O'Brien
Inside Image (Rose in Pink):
Makeup by Sia Kosmakis
Hair by Emily Rose Attridge
As women... we spend a lot of time taking care of others. Sometimes it's our friends... our lovers... children... parents. We work to juggle our jobs and relationships ...and try to make it all seem easy. Wonder Woman!
But what do you do for you? How do you cope with the stress of life? How do you stop the little things from turning into big things?
I pose this question because I realized lately... I haven't done some of the things that used to bring me great joy and help me work through my struggles and make sense of things.
This week I started singing again. I sang at my old a capella gig.... Christmas songs that make me smile. I heard my voice again...and it was therapeutic and refreshing and made me happy.
And I started writing again. It was one poem.... but after years of not expressing myself in this way... it felt good to reflect what I was feeling and see it in front of me.
"If I get it down on paper, it's no longer inside of me."
-Breathe by Anna Nalick
It's not selfish. We need to take care of ourselves before we can be healthy people and take care of others. Maybe you haven't thought about it for a bit. Maybe you practice it everyday...
I invite you to comment below...
What do you do for yourself?
Wedding Day. Pinned curls. Lace. Veil. Something new. White. Rings. Pearls. Diamonds. Something borrowed. High Heels. Airbrush. Love songs. Centerpieces. Something blue. Bouquets. Baby's breath. Soft. Pure. Perfect. The Dress.... The Dress...... Oh, The Dress!
A Dress that awesome should never be worn just once! (I capitalize "Dress" in this sentence... because we should all honor and praise it....and hold it in the highest regard!)
One of my favorite things to do is re-purpose! Doing a very different photo shoot, without your mom and bridesmaids... without the stress of having to get to the cocktail hour. Just the bride (or bride and groom), me and a camera.
Let me paint a picture!
ROCK THE DRESS SHOOT. Runway hair... Big and FIERCE! Dramatic makeup! Model! Boots! Rockin' necklace! Bracelets for days! Your favorite bad-ass rock song playing! Edgy! Fun! Relaxed! Showing your color shine through all that white!
MESS THE DRESS SHOOT. Let's face it.... your daughter probably won't wear your dress in 30 years. Jump in the ocean! Be an artist... play around in paint! Roll around on the beach! Have a food fight with your husband! Skies the limit!
This time... September, October, November - post-wedding, is the perfect time for one of these shoots! It can be whatever you want! I'd be thrilled to brainstorm great ideas that will reflect you!
SOOOO MUCH FUN! Get back in that dress before you box it up! Don't you want to feel great wearing it, just one more time!
I said it once... I'll say it again. A dress that awesome should never be worn just once!